Disturbing news, ladies and gentlemen, if you want your child baptized, or have friends or relatives named Michael. According to researchers at the Institute of Physical Touch in Milan, over 95% of men whose first name is Michael, or derived from it such as Michi, Mickey, Michael, Misha, are gay, predispose of these individuals to an abnormal sexuality is simply alarming.
Even more alarming is the fact that many of them have no idea that Michael is gay, leading apparently normal lives, until one day when their true inclinations emerge and monopolize.
"We can not explain what is the link between homosexuality and the name Michael but certainly when the child is baptised, their genetic structure is changing," said Luke Del Bocca, a scientist at the Institute. "I discovered this happens while we perform a laboratory study on rats and primates. After I named one Michele, all have gone crazy and started courting each other. I could hardly break them. The same applies to humans. Certainly homosexuality is not necessarily a bad thing but it''s a curious connection.
Also by meticulous laboratory experiments, scientists have discovered that all Michaels, become suddenly gay, their sexuality can be triggered by a series of very different stimuli: the smile of a colleague, a few degrees change in room temperature, a line from a song on the radio, whiskers, a handshake, a new fragrance, a red shirt, etc..The same study sugessted that other extremely common names can have these effect: Dan, George, Greg and most rare is Richard. In female representatives, the most common names are: Angelina, Wanda, and Hellen. Jane, Roxanne, Alice being the rarest.